Now comes the hard part…

Classroom orientation ended today at 2.30pm. I officially start on the floor on Tuesday morning. I’m hoping I remember where to go. I hope to remember where to swipe my ID card so I can get paid. I’m hoping that I bought the right color scrubs. I’m looking forward to this new challenge, but at the same time I’m extremely nervous and scared. I’ve always sat behind a desk. Going from one desk job to another desk job in a different industry isn’t all that bad…but going to a job where I won’t even have a desk…completely nerve racking. I’m used to patients… I’ve been a patient… I know how to talk to patients…but I’m still feeling a little insane about it.

Last night wasn’t a great night… I’m hoping it was a REALLY bad case of PMS… b/c I sat & cried about not being married all night (well.. ok.. not ALL night…but off and on for most of Grey’s Anatomy). I’ve heard all the axioms. And I’m sick of hearing them (so.. if you want to comment on this subject for me…you better think of something brand new to say). I’m just tired. I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of being that cool girl that no one wants to date. I’m tired of having guy friends who screw me over and aren’t man enough to apologize. I’m tired of guy friends who think you want more than just friendship when you ask them to do something (because I’m over 30, single and therefore totally desparate). I hate myself (***author’s note: I do not literally *hate* myself.. this is more of a figure of speech. I actually really like myself… some will say I like myself a little too much) for missing J.because I miss his friendship (but then was it a real frienship? i don’t even know anymore).

Ok. Enough of that for now. Tonight I’m going to see the 4th Indy movie. I was extremely excited about it until my parents saw it last night and reported that 1) my mom liked “Iron Man” better and 2) my dad hated it. So, my expectations have been lowered quite a bit.

Tomorrow.. I was planning to go to NYC for the day. I wanted to walk around the Met. I guess I’ll “officially” decide tomorrow morning when I get up.

As for right now…I’m going to get the mail. I’m sure the TMobile bill will be waiting. I know.. an exciting life I lead.

Ta-ta for now. It’s Memorial Day weekend. Hug a Veteran. I see the elderly veterans outside of Wawa selling the poppies & I put a buck in their coffee tin and smile. They have the most amazing stories.

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5 responses to “Now comes the hard part…

  1. When people want to relate do you always snap back at them? Aw, come on now.

  2. ooh… you are making me feel guilty… you haven’t read far back enough if you didn’t see that comment coming.

  3. If I read far back enough I will see lots of the same old advice about relationships? Uh, oh.

  4. Can we let that go already? It isn’t funny anymore and it is getting old. Time to move on I think.

  5. I always think of this (it is from Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil) when I am upset and there’s nothing I can do about it:

    two tears in a bucket…mother*&ck it!

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