10.58pm

Wow. I guess a lot more people are reading this than I thought. I’ve always let myself be pretty vulnerable at times on this blog… for better or for worse. People have disagreed with me. People have stopped reading because of some of my attitudes that I have voiced, etc…

If you ask any of my close friends… one thing they will ALL agree on… I’m honest. I don’t BS at all. So, I can’t really say I’m sorry if I mention J. more than you would like… or if I complain about my lack of dating &/or being single because I guess if you don’t like it… you can just go read cnn.com or something else.

I wish I had it more together when it comes to this area of my life. I stll haven’t figured it out at all. And, maybe I never will.. and that scares me. It scares me that the great majority of my friends are married with children and I know I can never have a child (Yes. It’s a medical fact).

Someone suggested match.com. Let me tell you one of the guys that I met.. Healthcare field, liked baseball, liked movies, seemed great. Well, he asked if I wanted to go to a concert on that Friday night. I met him at the local Starbucks on Wednesday night. We talked. He went to all the trouble to take down directions to my house. Said he would call on Thursday with details. Well, I think you know where I’m going with this. He never called. I know that’s just one guy. Not a very good guy in my book.

Or.. if you read back far enough… maybe a few years… a woman I knew from the university where I worked suggested that when I give more money to my church… then, and only then will I meet the “one”.

Or… all the married couples who tell me that marriage doesn’t complete you… “Wouldn’t you rather be single than marry the wrong one?”

I know all this. Believe me. I know all this. There have been a few wonderful people who understand that all I really want is for them to listen and to let me vent and to not offer advice and to just agree that “yea, it sucks sometimes.” Because sometimes it really does suck.

Ok. that’s it. Have a good evening.

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9 responses to “10.58pm

  1. No advice or observations from me in this comment.

    Just…

    Know that you are loved. Go loves you. We love you.

    That’s it.

  2. I can never have children either. I personally get depressed when I see people mistreating their children (abuse, neglect, etc). I have no cousins, no siblings, nothing…most of the women in my family are infertile, too. I always felt like the last unicorn when I was little…and we really were sort of facing extinction in my family…still are, I guess. I don’t have a point. I just kind of happened upon this blog and I saw this and wanted to talk.

  3. i never saw the correlation between tithing and dating… but yes, it really makes sense now.

    (i’m being horribly sarcastic of course)

    πŸ™‚

  4. Wouldn ‘t there actually have to be a negative correlation between tithing and dating(less resources available for dating)?

  5. scott, that comment sounds like it could have come out of my mouth. i laughed out loud sitting here at my desk.

    yes, i would agree with you…but you see.. if i gave more money.. then the men would be flocking towards me and they would have to pay for everything b/c i would be broke. :O)

  6. You are clearly a brilliant women>

  7. darn tootin’ (for the “G” crowd)

    damn straight (for my “R” crowd)

  8. You know we love you. As my therapist would say, everyone has something … and this is your something. Maybe it will change and maybe it won’t, and yes, life does suck sometimes. We still love you when it sucks and when it doesn’t as I hope you love me when I go a little crazy (my something).

  9. Somehow i missed the point. Probably lost in translation πŸ™‚ Anyway … nice blog to visit.

    cheers, Cinderella!

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